More Tributes to Carmen Provenzano:

This information supplements the article on Carmen that was published in Volume 2 Number 2 of Townies Magazine.

Mary Desimone: Niece

When I think and speak of Uncle Carmen I do it in the present tense. He is still with us. I feel him all around me.  Carmen is my uncle. I have known Uncle Carmen since I was five years old. I was the flower girl at his wedding. When I think of Uncle Carmen, I think of a proud man, face beaming, proud and grateful for the same things each and everyone of us should hold dear in our hearts.

Be:
Proud of yourself,
Proud of your family,
Proud to be a Canadian,
Proud of your heritage,
Proud of your community.
I know I am proud of him.

Greyhound friend Kevin Murnaghan:

Looking back, I chuckle at the reasons I thought I was the luckiest 17 year old kid ever to enter the SSM city limits. I had made the Greyhounds as a walk on. I had life by the horns and I knew everything. Or so I thought…

My life was about to change dramatically and it had absolutely nothing to do with hockey. I still remember exactly how it started. “Hey Murny, my parents live in the Soo. Why don’t you stay there during training camp?”

I was now officially part of the real life sitcom called the Provenzano household. For the first week, I did not know exactly who lived in the house. Friends and family would stop by at any hour, have a bite to eat, maybe stay the night and then be on their way. The wear in the base plate as you enter the house is reminiscent of that of a grocery store that sees hundreds of people a day. The security bolt on the front door was rusted open and those that actually used the doorbell before entering were reprimanded. I had no idea what I was getting myself into.

It was a couple of weeks into the year before I realized that Carm would actually wait until I came home from practice before he would eat. Seems normal you might say? Not for Carm. This man liked to eat! I look back now and appreciate every one of those meals and I wish I could have had 1000 more with him. We would talk about the day gone by, solve the world’s problems and without failure, talk about at least one of his children at each sitting. You could tell that he was genuinely interested in what you had to say and would give you advice only when you wanted it.

As soon as the plates went away, out came the crib board. I think I owed him about $100,000 by the time I moved out. He taught me the game, but under no circumstances would he hand me a victory. He knew me very well. He knew exactly what I was throwing away even though the cards were face down. In each game there was a lesson and once again it had nothing to do with the game we were playing. He taught me to be a good man, good friend and good husband.

If putting up with me for two years in his house wasn’t enough, Carm hired me when he was in Ottawa to man the Parliament Hill Office. These are some of the best memories I have with Carm. He was even happier than usual when he was strolling around the Hill talking politics. I really hope people understand how hard he worked for the Soo. He just didn’t like blowing his own horn and I tried so hard to talk him out of that. I just cannot stress enough about how much he loved the Soo.

As I await the birth of my first baby, I can only hope I will be as good a father as Carm was. I want my kids to talk about me the way the Jana, Frank, Luke and Mark talk about Carm. I want all of my kids’ friends to come to my house and ask me what they should do next. I want my house to be the one that everyone comes to feel wanted, safe and happy. This is the environment that Carm created in his house and his life.

Carm you were like a father to me and I miss you dearly. I just wish I could have thanked you for everything you have done for me. I am a better person for having known you. Keep the crib board handy as I am sure our paths will cross again.

Michael McCracken: Nephew

Michael McCracken, Carmen’s nephew at nineteen, recalls that while his parents were at camp, Carmen invited him to stay at the house. His friends dropped him off at 2:30 a.m. and the front door was open. When Michael went inside, there were ten Greyhound hockey players eating soup. He asked where his aunt and uncle were. The reply was that Carmen had gone to the store to pick up something to drink.

My Uncle Carmen wanted me to return to the Soo and apply for a job at Algoma Steel. When I explained that with my first cheque I would take him out for supper, my uncle said that he would not eat for a couple of days. None of his own children were in town and he treated me like one of his own family. “He was like a dad to me,” Michael boasted. While at work, a phone call came at 10:30. I thought that perhaps it was my uncle calling to go to supper. I did not have the opportunity to take my uncle out for that special meal. I learned the sad news that my Uncle Carmen had passed away.

Frank Provenzano: (Carmen’s eldest son )

My dad’s loss has been profound. When I think of him, I think of a man of quiet integrity. Even though I lived away from the Sault for the last 18 years, I would speak with him at least once every couple of days. He was a great sounding board.

My father loved to eat but he only liked to eat certain things. I have had the opportunity to travel quite extensively and my dad, instead of saying he didn’t like a certain type of cuisine that I was telling him about, would tell me all the health reasons not to eat it.

He was proud to be a Member of Parliament, proud to be from Canada but most of all, he was proud of Sault Ste. Marie. No matter where I was traveling to he would always tell me how the Sault had the same or better. Scuba diving in Australia? They scuba dive at Point DesChenes. Skiing in the Rockies? Searchmont has tons of snow. How I miss those conversations.

Ultimately, every day when I think of my dad, I try to be just a little more like him. If I can do that, what a better person I will become.

Mark Provenzano:

I remember one night when I was in High School I damaged the car. I was so scared to call my dad the next morning to tell him what I had done. After calling him and explaining what I had done he never mentioned a word about the damage to the car or gave me heck for being careless. All he was concerned about was my health and well-being. I was so worried because I didn’t want to disappoint him or let him down. I guess I felt badly that everything my dad owned, we kids seemed to ruin. The man never really had anything for himself and was one of those unique human beings that would give so much and never ask for anything in return. My dad cared about the health and well-being of his family and friends and not material possessions.

Carmen was a fatherly figure to many people. After his passing, so many people confirmed that. Dad was a true role model for us in every aspect of life. He was simply an amazing father and man!

Lucas Provenzano ( Kara & Ronan ):

What I remember best about my father is that he loved life and he loved his family. He would stop whatever he was doing if you needed advice and would help anyone.

I loved my father for the way he embraced and loved his only grandson, my son Ronan. Seeing his eyes light up when he and my son got together brought a joy to me that I can never truly explain. One of my regrets is that my son will not have the opportunity to learn so many things that my dad taught me. I know they would have been the best of friends. He would have been so excited and happy to know he was going to be a grandfather again this spring.

My father was a successful man in many ways but what I have come to understand was that his greatest success, aside from the love he freely gave his family, was the respect that he had for humanity and the respect, admiration and love he received in return. Whether great or small, his words and actions usually made someone’s life better. He was giving and generous, yet extremely humble looking for what dividends his generosity would yield.

My father was regarded as a fierce competitor and an exceptionally tough individual in many ways. He was the type of individual that you wanted in your corner when the odds seemed insurmountable. With his guidance and wisdom you could overcome the odds. He found great pleasure in facing great odds and took the path of least resistance. He did what was right, not what was easy.

I will miss my father’s strength which seemed larger than life. He left behind a legacy of examples by which I will live my life and pass on to my own children.

Jana Provenzano:

My dad was so much of everything that trying to paint an accurate picture of him by telling a few stories is going to be difficult. Those who were close to him knew that he was a complex, unorthodox, beautiful man.

Living with my dad his last two years in Ottawa where I was teaching was an opportunity I couldn’t pass up. My dad and I were close. I was always and will always be his “little girl” but living with him during those two years our relationship evolved. He became my “roomy” and my friend.

An occurrence that I miss was sometimes waking up to the smell of coffee. He would make coffee and put a cup right beside my bedside table. I would wake up to my dad sitting on the edge of my bed staring out the window just waiting for me to wake up so we could have a coffee and talk. We would talk for minutes and sometimes for what seemed like hours.

Two weeks before my father passed away he called me to talk to me about my fiancé. My fiancé and I were only together for a year before we became engaged. My dad was slowly getting to know him. It was one of our last big conversations and he told me that he loved Greg because in the time he spent with him he could see how much he loved me. That was all my dad needed. This is just a glimpse of how much room he had in his heart; he was always willing to let people in.

My dad was not perfect but he was special. Like most father/daughter relationships, we bumped heads. Like most roommates, we got annoyed with each other at times. However, I missed him the minute he walked out that door and I worried about him driving back to his favourite city the Sault, until I got that call saying he was safely home. I miss my “roomy” every minute and I think about him every second. I lost a father and a best friend.